It seems like my whole life I have worked with kids in some form or fashion. They never fail to take me by surprise with the things they say or do. Sometimes it is funny, and then sometimes I think I work on a funny farm. It is always something interesting, though.
I like lists. The movie High Fidelity is one of my most favorite movies, because John Cusack's character is always coming up with his top 5 of everything. So in the spirit of lists, I have decided to compile a list of things I wish I hadn't heard and/or seen. Some names have been changed to protect the not so innocent! If you have a weak stomach you might want to stop reading!
"Miss Floyd! Tommy is sucking his toes!"
"Miss Floyd! Tommy just tried to lick my ear!"
"Miss Floyd! I need to *insert puking noise here*!"
"Miss Floyd! I need a tissue *insert image of a child stringing snot from his hands and nose to the tissue box*!"
"Miss Floyd! My ponytail just came off! Can you put it back on?"
"Miss Floyd! When Johnny threw up on the table, some splattered on my shirt!"
"Miss Floyd! Suzy just peed in the sink of the girl's bathroom!" (I only WISH I were joking!)
"Miss Floyd! Someone wrote about you in the bathroom in red permanent marker!" (And it wasn't "Miss Floyd's my favorite teacher!")
"Miss Floyd! You sure have put on weight!"
But then there are those things you hear that just melt your heart!
"Miss Floyd, you're hair smells really good!"
"Miss Floyd, you are SO skinny!"
"Miss Floyd, can I hold your hand?"
"Miss Floyd, can you teach 5th grade so I can have you again?"
"Miss Sarah, I was one point away from commended on my reading TAKS!" (Matthew, my friend Elaine's son, after years of struggling in reading.)
"Miss Sa - wah, I need a hug!" (Sweet little Noah, Matthew's little brother.)
"Tay-uh, Tay-uh!" (Little Noni Gearhart trying to say my name as she runs to hug me!)
"Aunt Sarah, you're my favorite!" (My nephew, Kolin, 3)
So I guess when working with children, and loving children, you have to take the good with the not so good. I don't think I'd trade it for anything! Well.......maybe some Calgon and a bottle of Advil!